Wow.

I haven't updated this in forever and a half.

But since suddenly everyone and their mother has a journal, I figured I'd make an effort to join the club and distract my addiction to myspace a little.

So I started working at Fastenal with Luke on Monday...Something I didn't want to do at frist, but it's been OK. Matt, Pfeiffer, Dick, Cory, Sam, Justin and all my friends have helped me keep my mind off worrying that I'm gonna fall for Luke again, and working with him is actually pretty fun. It makes things go faster, unlike at Shorewest where I just SIT there and do nothing.

We talked today about missing the way things used to be with us...And well, when I thought about it I guess I sort of do too. I don't miss the hell we went through in the end, just fighting and hating life, but I miss the good ole days of staying up till 1 Am on school nights talking to eachother and hugs from around a car seat in Jackie's car and making out in tents in my basement, haha. I dunno. I'm sooo happy right now, I haven't felt this happy since Luke and I were together in the first place. But it's like...#1) Is luke just doing this to make me like him then he's just gonna be a dick, and #2) I don't want to jeopardize losing my baby. I mean I'm really confused. I miss how things used to be but I don't think they'd ever be that way. I miss how I always felt cared for, but I feel that way too. It's just something about the past that will always make me care about Luke and that's why I think we're still close.

Whatever I don't know what I'm trying to say.